There is a situation that I am involved in right now that is making me very uncomfortable and it’s mostly because of gossip.  I don’t like gossip.  I’m not going to go so far as to say I’ve never done it because I think it’s one of those things like lying – we don’t want to do it, we know it’s wrong, but sometimes we catch ourselves doing it.  It’s frustrating!

But anyway, gossip can turn someone’s opinion of another person into a completely different direction if you’re not careful.  And the old adage is true – there ARE two sides to every story.  I know a lot of us, including me, like to think our side is the “right” side and that we are always right but unfortunately that’s not true.  We ARE wrong sometimes, we DO get mistaken ideas about people, we DO misread situations.  It’s not fair to tell other people something negative about someone because you aren’t happy with them at the time or you think something happened a different way.

I had a situation yesterday where three or four different people were talked about in a totally negative way – things were said that totally turned people’s opinion of these people in a different direction.  They now may think they are “bad” people or people that they shouldn’t be around.  It’s ridiculous!  I know these people and they AREN’T bad people!  I also (kind of) know both sides of a couple of the stories and I know that the facts are not what are being shared.  I really think things have been blown out of proportion and only one side of the story has been told but conclusions have immediately been drawn and now I’m afraid these people have a “bad” reputation.

It just makes me so sad.  And the hard part is, I really don’t see a solution to the problem.  I don’t see a way to fix it.  It’s something I’ve been praying about for quite a while and will continue to do so but it’s so hard.  I just pray that God moves in these people’s hearts and shows them that what they are doing is wrong.  Will you pray with me?  I know you don’t know the people or the situation but I would sure appreciate a quick little prayer even as you read this!!

The moral of the story…think before you speak.  Just like mommas always say, if you don’t have something nice to say don’t say anything.

Why do people all of a sudden seem to think it’s okay to run red lights?  I can’t even tell you how often I’ve seen that happen lately.  Do these people not realize they are running the risk of taking someone’s life simply because they don’t want to take a few extra seconds out of their life to stop!

About two weeks ago a seventeen year old boy lost his life in an intersection about a mile from my house because some woman decided to keep on going right through the red light.  That boy will never get to grow up.  His family will never see him grow up.  All because this woman was so stupid and so selfish that she couldn’t take a little bit longer and actually stop like she was supposed to.

The scary thing is that people do that at this intersection all the time!  And I’m not just talking about going through when it’s yellow but it turns red before you get through.  I’m sure that’s happened to most of us since some yellow lights are long and some are short.  I’m talking about running it when it’s red before you even get to the intersection.  Why would someone do that??  The really scary thing is that this intersection is by truck stops and I’ve seen lots of semi-trucks running red lights as well.  How much of a chance do you think a car would have against a monster vehicle like that?!?!

I’ve always been pretty good about obeying traffic laws but I have become even more aware of things since our daughter began driving about six months ago.  When I see people do these things around me I always wonder what would have happened if my daughter had been driving.  It’s scary!  I know it’s not the right thing to do but I want to yank these people out of their cars and yell at them and try to get through their heads the fact that they are endangering people’s lives when they do that!

You know, I don’t necessarily think that the accident rate for teenagers is so high because they are driving recklessly or carelessly.  I think a lot of it is caused by adults who are so wrapped up in their own little world that the don’t pay attention to anything but themselves.  These poor kids without much experience don’t have a chance – just like that seventeen year old boy – when confronted with situations like these.  They don’t have the reflexes yet or the experience to always know what to do.

So, the whole point of this is – if you are driving and you come to an intersection where the light is red or yellow PLEASE STOP!  You might just save someone’s life by doing so.

Okay, I’m getting off my soap box now.  Thanks for putting up with it.

GETTING PEOPLE TO THE SALE

1. Large and/or colorful signs work well to draw traffic to your garage sale.

2. DO NOT write a bunch of words (street address, directions, items for sale, etc.) on your small sign – it CAN’T be read while driving past it in the car!

3. DO write garage or yard sale on your sign in large, bold letters.

4. Arrows pointing towards your sale work just as well if not better than writing your address on the sign. (This is especially true if there are several signs on the same street corner – people are NOT going to remember all those house numbers and street names!)

5. If the customer needs to make a turn to get to your sale make sure you have a sign on that corner directing them to turn.

6. If your sale is deep into the neighborhood (i.e. you have to pass a lot of streets before getting to your sale) you should put signs up occasionally saying “this way” or “up ahead” or something so that the person knows that they are going the right way and they don’t give up.

AT YOUR SALE

7. Be friendly! Smile and say hi! It’s so much more welcoming than being ignored.

8. When someone purchases something, pay attention to them and say thank you. I went to a garage sale recently where I wanted to buy something and the lady sat there talking on the phone. I walked up to her with my money and she took it and never looked at me or said a word to me. How rude!

9. Have things clearly marked with a price (as much as possible). There have been many times that I might have bought something if it had been marked but I will pick up several things and nothing will have a price so I leave. People don’t want to keep asking, “how much is this?” over and over again so if you can’t mark each thing come up with a price list or group things on your tables by price or something.

10. Expect people to offer less but realize that you can say no. For some that’s the fun of garage sales and some people will mark stuff knowing that they will be offered less. So don’t be afraid to say no but mark stuff knowing that will happen and be willing to negotiate.

11. Organize things on tables and racks – don’t just throw stuff all over the driveway or set it out in boxes for people to dig through. If people have to dig through an entire box of junk to see what’s in it they probably won’t look. If it’s laid out nice and neat then they can see it all and find exactly what they want.

12. Please, please, please don’t sell stuff that’s just gross (e.g. old dirty mattresses, old dirty pillows with slobber stains all over them eewww!, clothes with stains – and I don’t just mean a little stain here or there – I mean gross stains! or anything else that’s just gross – you get the idea).

13. If you have something that’s worth a lot of money or that you won’t sell for fairly cheap you may be better off putting an ad in the paper for that item. Not many people go to garage sales to find something they will spend $500 to $1000 for!

14. And last but definitely not least – please put prices on things that are reasonable FOR A GARAGE SALE! I can’t tell you how many garage sales I’ve been to where people expect to sell something for the same price they paid for it brand new. I’ve even seen stuff priced higher than what it would cost for a new one at the store!!! It’s frustrating to walk up to a garage sale and see things marked for five dollars that you would find marked for a quarter or a dollar at other garage sales.

Also, if you’re going down the highway going s – l – o – w please don’t change lanes (especially to the left!) and jump right in front of people who are actually going with the flow of traffic. This happened to me on the way back from downtown and again I had to slam on my brakes to avoid hitting this person!

Okay, I’ll stop complaining now.

****update: Okay, my husband told me last night that the way I said that about my fingers made him think I was going to flip the person off. THAT IS IN NO WAY WHAT I MEANT!!! I was trying to give you a visual of HOW CLOSE I was to getting really mad (which would have just been more yelling) – you know, holding your thumb and finger together about an inch a part?? I would NEVER flip somebody off. Just wanted to clarify that!!!

1.  Please leave the room if you have a child/baby that is screaming or crying uncontrollably – do you really think others can’t hear it or that it’s not disturbing while trying to listen to a speaker???

2.  Please don’t kick the chair that is in front of you when it is occupied by someone – it’s VERY annoying to have your chair kicked over and over again!  In fact, just don’t kick chairs at all and you won’t ever have to worry about disturbing someone!

3.  If you find yourself standing in a very confined space with a very large backpack on your back, realize that every time you move around you’re hitting people with said very large backpack.  Please remove the backpack so that you aren’t knocking people down or don’t go into the space that won’t hold more than one person if a backpack is included.

4 .  If you find yourself walking down a hallway going one way and others are walking down the hallway going the other way (each on their own side) and you suddenly realize you need to enter a room that is across the flow of traffic and you must plow across the hall could you at least say excuse me?  Actually it would be more polite to wait until the path to the door is clear but, I know I know, that would be thinking too much of other people!

Okay, so to explain why I’ve come up with these simple guidelines to follow, here is what happened to me – I was sitting in a conference trying to listen to the keynote speaker and there were people in the back of the room with screaming/crying children.  I was having a very hard time focusing on the speaker more than once during his time on stage.  A little later I was sitting in a different room in a workshop and the person behind me continuously kicked my chair (I’m not sure if it was mine or the one next to me but all the chairs were connected so any chair she kicked in that row would have made it feel like mine was being kicked.)  After that I was in a vendor’s booth looking at some books in a very narrow walkway (barely large enough for two people to be standing back to back) and this woman was behind me with a backpack on and she kept moving around or bending over or something and every time she did she whacked me with her bag.  Not once did she acknowledge that she hit me at all.  I finally had to move before I got knocked down!  And lastly, I was walking down a hall and an entire family – mother, dad, children, and a baby in a stroller – crossed right in front of me so that I almost ran into them.  They didn’t even acknowledge that I was walking there or say excuse me or anything.  One second they were on their side of the hallway and the next they were right in front of me.  I just can’t get over the lack of common courtesy these days.  Honestly, do people realize that they aren’t walking around on this earth by themselves?  UGH!

Saying Grace In A Restaurant

Last week, I took my children to a restaurant.

My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace.

As we bowed our heads he said, “God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! Amen!”

Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, I heard a woman remark, “That’s what’s wrong with this country. Kids today don’t even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!”

Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, “Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?”

As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job, and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentle man approached the table.

He winked at my son and said, “I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.”

“Really?” my son asked.

“Cross my heart,” the man replied.

Then, in a theatrical whisper, he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), “Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes.”

Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment, and then did something I will remember the rest of my life.

He picked up his sundae and, without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, “Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already.”

Sometimes, we all need some ice cream. I hope God sends you some Ice Cream today

I read this in the Sunday paper a couple of weeks ago and I wanted to share it. We need to make sure to support our military and their families no matter what we believe about the war. They are putting their lives at risk every day to make sure that you and I have the freedoms that we so enjoy in this country.

ARMY WIFE ANSWERS ONLINE CRITICS OF SOLDIERS AND WIVES

DEAR ABBY: My husband serves in the U.S. Army. I am a proud Army wife. Lately, more and more people are openly speaking out against the war in Iraq, as is their right. However, people are also speaking out against soldiers, and now, even their wives.I was recently confronted by a message on MySpace. The writer, a woman, called Army wives everything in the book. I was heartbroken. She said we were all uneducated. (I have my degree in psychology.) She said we all just sit home and spend our husbands’ money. I am a stay-at-home mom, but I do not ever get to sit.

She also stated that the Army paid us to have kids. This is not true, either. We do not get paid any more for having one child or seven. She said Army wives whine about missing their soldiers overseas and that it’s not that dangerous — you could die from any job. Not many wives outside the military have to go weeks without talking to their spouses and not knowing if they are OK. Jobs outside the military can be dangerous, yes, but people are not trying to harm them.

I just want people to know you can disagree with the war, with our leaders, with what happens in the world, but please do not group people together and look down on them. We military wives have it hard, but we keep things together the best we can. Our men fight for the rights some people take for granted. Please keep that in mind. — KATRINA IN FAYETTEVILLE, N.C.

DEAR KATRINA: Although many people are against the war in Iraq, and it is their right to speak openly about it, that does not give anyone the right to scapegoat the wives of the people who are fighting there. Scapegoating any group reveals more about the ignorance of the person doing it than the target of the nastiness.

Just because something appears on the Internet does not mean that it is true or factual. There is a lot of misinformation floating around out there, and the statements you quoted in your letter are part of it.

I am pleased to help you get the message across. But please do not stop with me. Spread the word on any site you feel the need to — and that includes MySpace.

So we are already frustrated at this and we finally get up where we can see what’s going on and notice that there is road work ahead and they have signs up saying we need to merge AGAIN because the left TWO lanes were closed ahead! (I should point out here that another lane appears on the right side of the highway at this point because of the way the acceleration lane is laid out for the exit we had just passed.) Well, we kept going because it didn’t look like any lanes were actually closed. We got to the point where it said the lanes would be closed and they weren’t – and guess what! – traffic was moving again. All of the bottleneck traffic was because of signs saying two lanes would be closed and THEY WEREN’T EVEN CLOSED! UGH!

I guess my point is – don’t try to cheat and get ahead of everybody else. Everybody else wants to get out of the mess just as quickly as you do and if we would just all have common courtesy while driving things would go so much smoother.